Log in

I am he as you are he as you are me

And we are all together.

I am in a really weird mood. I am feeling pretty cynical.

People can be pretty, pretty selfish.
Dieting thing? Feels like massive failure.

Anyways, guess what I am starting this Thursday from 6-7:50?

What am I going to do about this? Ugghhh. It is going to be embarassing. But I am just whining. I need to suck it up and just get with the program. Straight A'z! lolz.

I don't know why i decided to post right now. Today is boring.

All this stressing and running around.

Working non-stop, finishing up my room, worrying about my figure, hanging out with my sister before she goes back to school...

I am off work. I can't finish my room until my dad puts my book shelf together. I am doing all I can about dieting. Everyone is back in school.

You're left all alone with your thoughts. I can take a deep breath. But... that void is back.

Let's go somewhere, okay? Seriously.

California couldn't come sooner.

Do you know what I hate?

The competition between the Cambells and Progresso soups. Those commercials piss me off. Like, seriously, you have your Progresso soups that have really good thick and dark soups and your Cambell soups that have their really good chicken noodle soups. I don't know, their commercials are just so tacky.

Sooo, Christmas is in less than a leek. That's pretty awesome. I got all my shopping taken care of.

Ughhhh, I am just a little stressed out about some stuff. But tonight will make everything a lot better for sure.

I think Juno

is enough to make any young person never want to have unprotected sex. Ever. I don't think I could ever bring myself to give my baby up for adoption. It would be the worst thing ever.

I gave that movie so much shit the first time I saw it, saying it wasn't believable. But now that I have watched it three and a half times in the past three days, It is in my top five favorite movies.

Did I mention how fast this month is going?

Holllllyyy crap.
Just some things I am stressing about.Collapse )

Sam comes home this weekend and I know I will start working out twice a day everyday, if I can. Work is going to be non-stop too, but I will manage. I am sure Amanda will come with us, too!

On a brighter note, Someone sent me some of the funniest/creppiest myspace messages I have ever received today. Best messages ever!

Still very excited for the end of the month. Still very anxious!


With working out, working, and eating right, I have no time to be depressed. Infact, I do not have time for ANYTHING. I have already lost a little bit of weight and i forgot how good it feels. Like, really good. I am more so determined to get skinny as of just wanting it. I need it.

I am working out every single day without missing a day and eating right. (Except last night I had some Tyson Chicken nuggets...)

Work is murdering me. I work all the time. I do not even feel like it is Christmas in a few days. It is really sad. December is flying by so fast. It wasn't like this last year?

I decided that I talk a lot. I need to work on that.

I can't release many details, but if all goes according to plan, the end of this month (or beggining of next month) is going to be amazing. Trrrying not to get my hopes that high, however.


I am just stressin'.

Half a world away?

So. I have been thinking long and hard about what I want to do with my life. Like, colleges and stuff. And I have finally decided that I am going to go to an art school. Maybe out of Oklahoma. I talked about it with my mom and she was willing to accept the fact that I may be moving to Chicago.

I am scared that I will be the only person I know at a different school...But it is kind of neat in a way. It will be the biggest thing I have ever done in my life. But...I know I would get home sick. I get home sick just thinking about it. But I also get really, really excited. Chicago isn't THAT far...But, it isn't that close. It's far, far away.

I just KNOW that if I want to make clothes and make money out of it, living in Oklahoma is not an option.

And, it's not like I have been super happy lately. People have made me happy, but I mean HAPPPY from something I did by myself. By lately I mean since...well, May of 2007. Everything has been wrong since then.

My mom really wants me to look at all the possible schools. I am just kind of overwhelmed.


So I guess that some SHIT is going down in Landview and Pinevalley. More so Pinevalley. Everyone is about to get blown away in a tornado! Oh noes! I like it how everyone freaked out when they said it was a Tornado Watch. I guess Oklahoma doesn't freak out about those. But, this is a Soap Opera.
BUT I ALSO SAW THIS!?!?!? (Cover of Soap Opera Digest this week!)Collapse )


In other news, I work all thhee tiiime. And, you know what? I really don't mind it at all. It has gotten to the point that I really do not mind being at work all of the time. I am going into work tonight from four until ten thirty. SO if you are at the mall, you should swing by and talk to meee.

Life hasn't really been that hectic lately. It's kind of at a slowdown. I can't wait to go back to school, however. I am not as anxious as I thought I would be, but I am starting to feel kind of worthless just laying on the couch on the days I do not work. I really need to start saving more than half of my pay check for China this summer.

October is flying by SO FAST. I have only dressed up at work TWICE. Because I did not work last weekend. I really hope that I get all of the days I wanted off in November. I need to find out the date of Nikki's party.

This is what dreams are made of!

YAY!!Collapse )

Today was so fun! I went shopping with my mom, then out to eat with Brock and Michael, and it ended with Fun house and Walmart with Sarah and then Joey!

"You're standing in my doorway, seven cities ago.
The days are racing, but you come back too slow.
You're the finest thing that I've done,
a hurricane I'll never outrun.
I could wait around for the dust to still, but
I don't believe that it ever will.